The Big & Dandy Ego Death Thread

[Seven] · 14-02-2002, 00:42

The Big & Dandy Ego Death Thread

[original post:]

The only thing I've ever done is weed, I'm just wondering what the term ego death means? It's in a lot of the trip reports and such, I'm just looking for some more definition.

pinwheel · 14-02-2002, 03:26

I think ego death is simply what most would call a "reality check". Under the mental-physical-other effects of a substance, it usually has much more gravity towards the user.
It is a realization free from attachment, and is an important event in the search for confidence in our self.
An ego death is NOT a near-death experience, I think.

Beeebs · 14-02-2002, 03:37

My understanding is that it uses "ego" in the way freud talked about it. Ego is your conscious reality, and an ego death would be you stop being a person and just part of the environment.

Curious Yellow · 14-02-2002, 04:10

^I think I agree with you, but I'm not sure.
I always assumed it means to lose your "self-ness"... not only the concept of being a human but also the concept of who you are as defined by your personality.

fruitbat · 14-02-2002, 05:21

Im sure more experinced people could do a better job explaining, but in my few brushes with ego loss, i came close to being able to view myself totally objectively, say the way you might watch an ant crawling across the sidewalk. Of course in my case i was observing myself from inside my own brain so i could see my thoughts and feelings and contemplate what they all ment with out my own alerior motives getting in the way. It was a total separation of the my motivations and my perceptions into two components that did not influnence each other. Incredible, but not exactly "fun".

HydrA · 14-02-2002, 07:47

Ego death, a very debated subject with me and some friends of mine...
You basically lose yourself, and all sense of yourself. Its as if everything in front of you is a movie, and you are there experiencing, watching, and feeling whatever it is you are looking at. You don't analyze it to any degree, you just feel it. You can, in fact, exist as other objects, or other stimuli. Ego loss also allows you to view your inner self, and actions you have taken from a different perspective. Lots of k, or acid can do this quite well...or even a whippit to some degree

~hydra

Aftermath · 14-02-2002, 08:11

at 4.5grams of mushrooms and many many many hits of weed i experienced ego death. I also experienced the world in one big sworel it was neeto. It was like i wasnt even human any more it was like i was a creature .. a very very weird creature. shit it was neet

justsomeguy · 14-02-2002, 08:41

^^^^^^^^^
sounds like you were high as shit, d00d...

linolium · 14-02-2002, 09:09

I think I experienced ego-death once. I would describe it as being re-born; I had know clue what was going on, who/what i was or how anything related to anything. Complete and utter confusion; it was quite terrifying!

TheTruth · 14-02-2002, 09:52

This seems to be one of the most misused terms.

ebola? · 14-02-2002, 21:12

my definition:
when the border between self and other disappears.
ebola
np: haujobb

K9Unit · 14-02-2002, 21:41

Its a shcism between the mind and the body. Your corpral vessal becomes insignificant, and your mind becomes a solo observer of its envirement, with out a desire or abiility to change anything.

nasaltr0n · 15-02-2002, 00:17

I think an important aspect of ego loss is depersonalization, or by definition:
alteration in the perception of the self so that the usual sense of one's own reality is lost, manifested in a sense of unreality or self-estrangement, in changes of body image, or in a feeling that one does not control his own actions and speech; seen in depersonalization disorder, schizophrenic disorders, and schizotypal personality disorder. Some do not draw a distinction between depersonalization and derealization, using depersonalization to include both.
Although the two are not mutually inclusive of eachother all of the time. For as example to the contrary, I think the way people drive offensively involves depersonalization. You put certain people in a car and they just violate other people's personal space in a manner that most people would think twice about doing in a crowded hallway, on foot, face-to-face. There are also cultural differences here, but I'm sort of straying to other subjects now

cascadia · 15-02-2002, 02:09

Here's a real life story of what I interpret it to be.
I smoked approximately 50 mg of n,n-DMT. I was catapulted into a place I have never been to before. I didn't know who I was, I didn't know what "I" meant anyway. I was so immersed in the experience that I was no longer an observer, I was part of the whole experience.
I finally came back to myself when I started to realize I was hearing this blowing sound every few seconds. Then I realized what the sound was, it was the sound of someone breathing. "What is that sound? Holy shit, that's the sound of me breathing. Oh yea, I have a body! Oh yea, I am me!".
If you go to google.com and lookup "Ego Death", you will find many sites with different definitions.

ikarus · 15-02-2002, 02:50

I think you'll know what it is when it happens. That's the easiest way to find out what it is, you just can't quite put it into words.
-ikarus

dpp · 15-02-2002, 06:09

ego death is fun!

[Seven] · 15-02-2002, 18:11

You guys have helped me a lot with your different definitions of the phenemon. I will one day experience this with a friend of mine whom i discussed this with. Thanks for clarifying this vague term. Keep em coming!

ebola? · 15-02-2002, 20:49

>>I will one day experience this with a friend of mine whom i discussed this with.
If you are lucky. There is no 100 percent, absolutely-gonna-work recipe for ego disillusion. The closest thing is 15 mg of 5-MEO-DMT, vaporized
ebola
np: mentallo and the fixer

PARADIGM · 15-02-2002, 22:21

To me ego death is simply that. The death of the ego. Whatever good or bad feelings you had of yourself are gone. All prejudices in judging yourself are gone and you can look inside and find the true you.
For example, I used to find myself anxious in social situations, and then on my last mushroom trip, I confronted this problem of mine. I lost my ego, that judgemental, self-conscious side of me and was able to look at myself from the largest pespective possible.
[ 15 February 2002: Message edited by: PARADIGM ]

fruitbat · 18-02-2002, 13:25

I think a distinction has to be made between the loss of ego and the simple loss of body identification that happens with a disassocative like K. To discribe ego loss as a separation of mind and body is vast oversimplification of the concept of ego. While i suppose it could take that form, i would think that losing ego and body identity simutaniously would leave you mostly unaware of your existance at all, perhapes like what cascadia discribed.

Premium Blend · 18-02-2002, 22:26

EGO DEATH IS FUN???
I really hope you are joking about it being fun. Go lose your ego and then talk about things being "fun", you should get a nice laugh out of that one. To me it's re-birth. Seeing all your qualities from God's view. No longer yourself...detached from your self, but attached to the universe. Impossible to explain, but don't just go eat half a pound of mushies to see it...cuz you may regret it completely. Build up, step by step, and see if you're ready.

ananda · 19-02-2002, 09:59

Have to agree with TheTruth on this one, it is the most misused term in this forum. People who have a change in consciousness when on drugs have the idea that this is somehow the death of the ego, this is not so.
ebola! gave the correct definition when he/she said "when the border between self and other disappears".
Most of the other definitions and experiences are just changes in consciousness and dont come close to ego death which is a highly sought state among spiritual seekers and rarely achieved.
Drugs can temporarily breakdown the attachment of the mind to the ego and allow glimpses of self realisation, where the illusion of there being more than one is dissolved and the bliss of oneness is realised. Of course drugs are not the only or best method to attain this goal. Spiritual practices such as meditation have been used through the ages to reach this state.
Ego death is not a bad experience, it is highly sought after for someone who is ready and prepared for it. The people who say it is bad are either having a bad trip or become scared when the normal bodily consciousness starts to dissolve.

ebola? · 19-02-2002, 21:55

I was really scared going into ego disillusion, but without the ego, I didn't have a reason to be scared anyomore (I didn't have a GOOD one in the first place.

); it was bliss

Second Round KO · 20-02-2002, 00:15

I don't have the same opinion as the people who liked this experience. When it came upon me, I freaked out to some degree. I didn't expect it, and didn't know when it would end.
everybody's different, and I guess I came away with a new lense to look at life threw, which is always cool, but I don't consider it a pleasant experience at all.
ego death defines itself. There are certain things about being human which make us unique, and and ego death destroys these things, at least for the moment.

dpp · 20-02-2002, 04:26

haha, yes i was kidding about ego death being fun. but then again, i kind of wasn't. one night i took about 1/3 gram of the most potent dried mushrooms that i had ever taken.. and i expereinced what i THOUGHT was ego death. it was just on the threshold of what one would call a "level 5" mushroom trip. not quite to level 5, but right on the threshold. while i was in that state of mind, i really wasn't enjoying myself, and yes, it wasn't really fun. i don't remember most of the night.
however, when i look back on it, i can't wait to do it again because i'm ready this time, and i would be able to enjoy it. and i am quite certain that if i can get to that level again (or hopefully higher) i will have a blast and really enjoy the loss of ego..
i think the main problem with ego loss and why so many people have a hard time with it.. is they try to "hold on" to their ego, but there's no way in hell that's gonna happen.. so it's like you are defeated.. but you still think you have your ego and you still try to hold on to it.. if you just let go and let it happen, it won't be so bad.
[ 20 February 2002: Message edited by: dpp ]